Someone needed the survey for a daily's weekend issue. I obliged and got curious how he would answer. Marriage is too big a concept to squeeze in a few sentences. Yet this is that sincere attempt.
What is your idea of marriage? And what was the reason for getting married or planning to marry?
Ariel: I see it as bonding with someone forever, a partnership to live and thrive in this world, someone to love and to share the creation of God with, someone I can do things for and a partner with whom I can have the ultimate union that can only be shared with one person. To become one with her. I can't speak for others, but my reason for getting married is to honor God and the institution as He created it. To shed light in a world where there are hardly normal marriages. Someone to help me live in this world and help me get to God's kingdom, and also to share that union I can only share with one person. So in short, my idea of marriage is a place where love is core and the reason for planning it and getting married is to honor God in front of all.
Kristine: Contrary to popular notion of finding one person to complete the other, marriage for me is the union of two "complete" individuals knowing what they want and confident of what they can give in the relationship. My reason for hitting the wedding aisle is simple: I have found the person to marry.
How did you know that the person you are marrying is the right one? Does family background get into the picture?
Ariel: I know the person I am marrying is the right one because she points me to God, a source of inspiration to do good. Also because I and she are united in that goal to do good. Family background has a lot to do. Her being part of a complete family shows me that she has an example of making marriages work through good and bad times. Also because she's self-sacrificing to her family.
Kristine: He surpassed my ideals of the person to be with. We are on the same page in terms of faith, values, interests, altruism, intellect and priorities. Family background played little role in my choice.
How did you prepare for this commitment? And we don’t mean just the ceremony and reception; did you take any marriage seminars? How do you imagine your life to be after the wedding?
Ariel: No, I haven't taken any marriage seminars. Outside of the spiritual preparation, which to me is the foundation of an effective marriage, I have accumulated the experience and advise of many people along with my own life experience. No one can ever be completely prepared for marriage since every marriage has its own particularities. But I do take pains to ensure that I have self control, that I'm willing to yield when necessary. I imagine my marriage after the wedding to be as partners working together to form a loving home where we can work together for common goal. I see life in general as a test in preparation for heaven, marriage included. And marriage is also a character polisher. God uses it to bring to light my weaknesses.
Kristine: I prayed and let God weave my love story with the first boyfriend and now soon to be husband. I was just keen on God's next steps. Reading books on relationships and gleaning wisdom from people of experience also helped. I spent my entire single life building a career, pursuing post-grad studies and achieving financial independence. Yet all this bustle with the thought of settling down at one point, IF the right guy comes along. He did and I don't mind lying low from all this to give time for my husband and raise my kids full time. It's a paradigm shift, totally another phase of life!
Have you talked about finances and where to stay (Does it matter where you live and with whom?) And other practical aspects of marriage such as household chores?
Ariel: Yes we have talked about finances, also with whom we'll live. Household chores, she's work in progress in terms of being used to do it regularly, I am already used to doing them. In terms of how they will be shared, it depends on how often we're in the house, and how much work is required. So it is relative.
Kristine: Yes for all practical aspects we could think of: budgeting, abode, household chores, raising kids, respecting marriage bed, striking work-life balance and the like.
Do you believe in “forever?” in sickness and in health…etc. ‘til death do us part? How do you plan to make this happen?
Ariel: Marriage and divorce to me are the analogy of life and death. To me, the word divorce doesn't exist. That being said, I do believe couples have struggles. The one thing that I tested from the beginning is whether or not she has a character that allows her to work in spite of hard moments and is willing to reconcile and work differences. She struggles, but she does it anyway. Commitment is the word, and commitment is only as strong as the character a person has. I plan to make it work by yielding to her wishes, as long as it doesn't lead us to sin.
Kristine: I do. Humility, empathy, initiative and inviting God to be the center of our union are so far my essential ingredients.
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Sunday, March 21, 2010
For The Love of You
I just wanted to drop an I love you here just for the love I have for you, because it's the little things that make life so sweet. :)
There's more to be glad about than there is to be sad. There's always something to be thankful for, but no way to say coherently "I un-thank you for that."
Thank you babe for everything you do to make our love special. Ingat mamita.
Have a blessed week, and so does everyone who read this. :)
There's more to be glad about than there is to be sad. There's always something to be thankful for, but no way to say coherently "I un-thank you for that."
Thank you babe for everything you do to make our love special. Ingat mamita.
Have a blessed week, and so does everyone who read this. :)
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Paradigm shift
This is life. In random order – almost!
To have quiet time with God
To catch up with my Bible-reading
To lock up in my library for the whole day
To chat with Ariel till my fingers hurt, till my voice cracks, till my eyes give up, till there’s nothing else to talk about, till I just stare at him sound asleep in the webcam, till I no longer have to settle with online talks, till I am just inches away from his cushy cheeks
To bond with my sisters over food, Disney movies or just anything we think about having
To really have a conversation with Mama
To hear Papa on the phone
To play with or treat my baby cousins out
To spend a wonderful afternoon learning from my aunts and people of experience
To travel with friends
To see, hear, smell, feel, taste Thailand
To immortalize daily occurrences and displays in snapshots
To have reunion dinner with school and university friends
To be in the silence of myself reflecting about life
To, for once, shop for wants and not just needs
To have the liberty to be away and be in unfamiliar places where I can be another person
To be mesmerized by grand ambitions of change and by the possibility of making them happen if I continue believing
To get inspired by the children of Africa, Afghanistan and much of Asia
To compose a song
To sing not for the tune but for the lyrics
To speak my mind out and fearlessly interact with people
To rehash my dancing
To wander aimlessly under the clear sky, by the seashore, amid the cool breeze, with dry leaves crunching underneath my sole
To earn while pursuing my passion
To be unapologetically happy and fulfilled
To have quiet time with God
To catch up with my Bible-reading
To lock up in my library for the whole day
To chat with Ariel till my fingers hurt, till my voice cracks, till my eyes give up, till there’s nothing else to talk about, till I just stare at him sound asleep in the webcam, till I no longer have to settle with online talks, till I am just inches away from his cushy cheeks
To bond with my sisters over food, Disney movies or just anything we think about having
To really have a conversation with Mama
To hear Papa on the phone
To play with or treat my baby cousins out
To spend a wonderful afternoon learning from my aunts and people of experience
To travel with friends
To see, hear, smell, feel, taste Thailand
To immortalize daily occurrences and displays in snapshots
To have reunion dinner with school and university friends
To be in the silence of myself reflecting about life
To, for once, shop for wants and not just needs
To have the liberty to be away and be in unfamiliar places where I can be another person
To be mesmerized by grand ambitions of change and by the possibility of making them happen if I continue believing
To get inspired by the children of Africa, Afghanistan and much of Asia
To compose a song
To sing not for the tune but for the lyrics
To speak my mind out and fearlessly interact with people
To rehash my dancing
To wander aimlessly under the clear sky, by the seashore, amid the cool breeze, with dry leaves crunching underneath my sole
To earn while pursuing my passion
To be unapologetically happy and fulfilled
Sunday, February 28, 2010
Too much time
So I'm wondering, what is too much time?
From the perspective where I am right now (bored in the living room), too much time is being somewhere contemplating time passing by while doing nothing more than that.
That is too much time.
I'd better get moving or I'll grow old doing nothing here.
From the perspective where I am right now (bored in the living room), too much time is being somewhere contemplating time passing by while doing nothing more than that.
That is too much time.
I'd better get moving or I'll grow old doing nothing here.
Sunday, February 21, 2010
Great Communication
The disadvantage of "excellent" understanding of your mate. *giggle*
Thinking about you mamita. xoxo
Magic pill, Magic body
Ok, so basically I feel the need to give my opinion on these TV adds telling you some magic pill will give you the 'perfect' body.
First of all, the human body is as complex and as simple as anything in this world can get. There is no magic pill. There's healthy and unhealthy, practical and not practical. And while there are many gray areas as far as getting that body that you're comfortable with, the fact is that most of us falls into the black and white categories.
So here are the blunt facts:
1. Muscle cells don't increase in size by magic. They're living things. If they need money (energy) to pay a debt (worn out bc of exercise), they go to the ATM (your liver), and they ask for more protein so that next time they can pay the bills. The less debt, the less money they take out; the more debt, the more money they take out and grow.
2. Loosing and gaining weight is easy.
- To loose weight, you eat less than your body is using in a day; so all you've to do is split the entire meals of the day into several portions so you can eat every moment you want as long as you don't pass the daily limit you need.
- To gain weight, you just have to eat more than what you're using in a day. If you want to build muscle, then you have to make your muscles USE a lot of what you eat. If you're gaining a belly instead of more muscle, you're not exercising hard enough.
Forget all these people trying to rip you off with some special machine, or some magic pill, or anything that isn't exercise. Muscles under stress and your body using energy is all needed to change your body. Unless you have some sick body in which case, you should hit the doctor.
Silly infomercials *sigh*
First of all, the human body is as complex and as simple as anything in this world can get. There is no magic pill. There's healthy and unhealthy, practical and not practical. And while there are many gray areas as far as getting that body that you're comfortable with, the fact is that most of us falls into the black and white categories.
So here are the blunt facts:
1. Muscle cells don't increase in size by magic. They're living things. If they need money (energy) to pay a debt (worn out bc of exercise), they go to the ATM (your liver), and they ask for more protein so that next time they can pay the bills. The less debt, the less money they take out; the more debt, the more money they take out and grow.
2. Loosing and gaining weight is easy.
- To loose weight, you eat less than your body is using in a day; so all you've to do is split the entire meals of the day into several portions so you can eat every moment you want as long as you don't pass the daily limit you need.
- To gain weight, you just have to eat more than what you're using in a day. If you want to build muscle, then you have to make your muscles USE a lot of what you eat. If you're gaining a belly instead of more muscle, you're not exercising hard enough.
Forget all these people trying to rip you off with some special machine, or some magic pill, or anything that isn't exercise. Muscles under stress and your body using energy is all needed to change your body. Unless you have some sick body in which case, you should hit the doctor.
Silly infomercials *sigh*
Friday, February 19, 2010
Sabbaths
I am really liking the idea of having a day to rest. Even when the whole week is hectic, I know that the 7th day I can just sit down, rest, let my imagination flow, take a deep breath, and just let go all the burdens in the week.
And really, what does it help to be burdened with something that I can't control while I'm in my time for rest. I should have worried about that when I didn't do my tasks, but even if I didn't, then I can worry about them when they get to me in the following week. For now, all I can do is recharge my energies, relax, and spend time with those that love me.
Often times, that's what we need to keep focused during the week. A day to relax. Thank God for the Sabbath. I hope you all have a great rest, and that you may start refreshed and energized to conquer the week ahead. Peace ^_^.
And really, what does it help to be burdened with something that I can't control while I'm in my time for rest. I should have worried about that when I didn't do my tasks, but even if I didn't, then I can worry about them when they get to me in the following week. For now, all I can do is recharge my energies, relax, and spend time with those that love me.
Often times, that's what we need to keep focused during the week. A day to relax. Thank God for the Sabbath. I hope you all have a great rest, and that you may start refreshed and energized to conquer the week ahead. Peace ^_^.
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